Thursday, April 24, 2008
ii just remembered some things and suddenly, iim seriously pissed off with things. MANY MANY MANY things by the way. ii keep listening to my handphone in F&N larhhs. ii feel damn guilty okayys. iim supposed to be doing my homework and here ii am blogging. What the hell larhhs. iim listening to music off my handphone.
iim not doing my work. iim thinking about all the problems ii am having now and suddenly, ii have this HUGE miagraine forming in my head. Hell larhhs! ii know what she didn't want to tell me lerhhs. Seriously. ii know why she is so reluctant to tell me now. Its like, iim the cause of all the problems larhhs. Between me & her, ii started it. And because of that, iim actually causing her grief. See? iim guilty as charged okayys. ii saw what L'' wrote. Wait, nevermind. ii shall call him B. Cause, nevermind. Yahh. ii saw what B wrote about that problem lerhhs. ii don't know why ii even bother larhhs. ii mean like, iim the one who is acusing all sorts of friendships to turn sour. Everyone is crying and everyone is glum in class larhhs. Nothing is normal anymore. ii mean like, LOOK AT THE CLASS! The girls used to be SO united, SO enthu, SO whole. And now, because of me, the whole unity just crumbles. Look at it now. And compare it to US last time. See the difference. Everyone is like, stuck in the middle, not knowing what to do. iim stuck at one side, unsure of MY own thoughts, while SHE is also unsure of her own. The unity is gone, missing, melted and faded away into the air somewhere. ii wanna find it back. ii really do. ii miss the old time. Where everyone could laugh and smile and play and joke together. Everyday, ii sit in class thinking and then, ii try not to break down. ii mean like, HELLO!? ii started it larhhs. iim bloody sad. iim crying every now and then. ii don't do that to gain sympathy okayys B, you don't know what iim thinking. You don't even know what ii want. Do you ever think, why did she start? Did she ever think about what she has done? Did she ever think about changing everything back and revert it back to the past? No, you didn't. ii DEFINITELY did not apologise to her sarcastically. ii was crying. Were you there? Did you see what happened? Did you think, that when someoen is crying, she would think properly and shake someone else's hand? No. You didn't think of the factors that led to my not shaking of her hands. You did NOT think, that II really wanted to be friends with her again. And you definitely did NOT think about what ii really would think. If you had put yourself in MY shoes, maybe you did understand. You told me to put myself in her shoes B, you did. And ii DID. And ii regret. ii know ii caused EVERYONE grief. Especially her. She did not do anything to deserve this. Only me. So she has no rights to suffer in this hell while ii did. Don't you get it B? ii regret and wanna change. But ii don't know what to do, this leading to all this fuckked up crap that ii have continued to create. So, YAHH. iim living in regret.
iim not doing my work. iim thinking about all the problems ii am having now and suddenly, ii have this HUGE miagraine forming in my head. Hell larhhs! ii know what she didn't want to tell me lerhhs. Seriously. ii know why she is so reluctant to tell me now. Its like, iim the cause of all the problems larhhs. Between me & her, ii started it. And because of that, iim actually causing her grief. See? iim guilty as charged okayys. ii saw what L'' wrote. Wait, nevermind. ii shall call him B. Cause, nevermind. Yahh. ii saw what B wrote about that problem lerhhs. ii don't know why ii even bother larhhs. ii mean like, iim the one who is acusing all sorts of friendships to turn sour. Everyone is crying and everyone is glum in class larhhs. Nothing is normal anymore. ii mean like, LOOK AT THE CLASS! The girls used to be SO united, SO enthu, SO whole. And now, because of me, the whole unity just crumbles. Look at it now. And compare it to US last time. See the difference. Everyone is like, stuck in the middle, not knowing what to do. iim stuck at one side, unsure of MY own thoughts, while SHE is also unsure of her own. The unity is gone, missing, melted and faded away into the air somewhere. ii wanna find it back. ii really do. ii miss the old time. Where everyone could laugh and smile and play and joke together. Everyday, ii sit in class thinking and then, ii try not to break down. ii mean like, HELLO!? ii started it larhhs. iim bloody sad. iim crying every now and then. ii don't do that to gain sympathy okayys B, you don't know what iim thinking. You don't even know what ii want. Do you ever think, why did she start? Did she ever think about what she has done? Did she ever think about changing everything back and revert it back to the past? No, you didn't. ii DEFINITELY did not apologise to her sarcastically. ii was crying. Were you there? Did you see what happened? Did you think, that when someoen is crying, she would think properly and shake someone else's hand? No. You didn't think of the factors that led to my not shaking of her hands. You did NOT think, that II really wanted to be friends with her again. And you definitely did NOT think about what ii really would think. If you had put yourself in MY shoes, maybe you did understand. You told me to put myself in her shoes B, you did. And ii DID. And ii regret. ii know ii caused EVERYONE grief. Especially her. She did not do anything to deserve this. Only me. So she has no rights to suffer in this hell while ii did. Don't you get it B? ii regret and wanna change. But ii don't know what to do, this leading to all this fuckked up crap that ii have continued to create. So, YAHH. iim living in regret.
Imprints of ♥ 1:46 PM.
