Monday, September 22, 2008
Just when i thought things would be fine. It just came back out to haunt me. Things that i did, things that i could have prevented. It just all come rushing back in my mind. i won't forgive myself. i can''t forgive myself. i act like nothing is wrong but everything is wrong. i don't know who to tell, what to tell. Here and now, i suffer in hell. Things i did before. Seems to come back and haunt me now. i never really knew that the things i did brought so much displeasure to them. Maybe im selfish. Maybe im evil. Maybe i bitch and do things my own way without really thinking about others. In that sense, im bad.
Imprints of ♥ 12:44 PM.
Friday, September 19, 2008
right . i've decided that i shall REVEAL what has been in me for hell long ...
Firstly ... i admit that both me and sak was passerby ( just recently . like 2 days ago ) you may ask why . its simply becos you suck . your attitude sucks . your behaviour sucks . your everything sucks . i cant stand it anymore , sakdiyah cant stand it anymore . we had enough of being your so called good friends . We didnt fake act our kindness and friendship . WHEN DID WE EVEN BE KIND TO YOU ?? didnt you realise we wont go to you unless you come to us ? didnt you realise that we werent as close as ever ?? did you ?? i insulted you . SO WHAT ?? dont you even realise that your O's are coming up and your thinking of guys the whole day , folding stars for them and even like having a new stead ? its so freaking not the right time to do things . You have changed ever since you fell for elvyn . Thinking of guys for the whole freaking day . you spend your whole day talking to us about guys guys guys . have you even thought if we loved it or not ? we asked you to stop , u talk even more. Its so hard to talk something we wanna say to you . we tell you something , you change a topic to like your crushes or something . You tell us your so called stories , you tell us your whatever .. did you realise or know that YOUR HAND MOVEMENTS ARE REALLY LIKE EXAGERRATING ?? we dont wanna listen , you poke , you pinch , you whack or anything just to get us to listen . u called us your so called friends . have you even like thought for us ? i still cant forget the incident during teh FNN lesson where you forgot to preheat your oven and used Ying's and sak's did you even gave their feeling a thought ? and you . calling people around like your dogs or whatever . calling yuan hui to wash teh dishes and do the stuff that you dont wanna do . do u call this friendship ? i'll tell you . NO . you call us to do stuff for you , and if we dont , you'll try ways to get us to do it . you even have your own PET who you abuse like nobody's business. Have you ever thought for eugene ? and please , i dont need your trust . did you realise that your becoming more like samuel last time ? ? being desperate ?? or whatever ??? did you realise that the number of friends u have are like decreasing each day ?? i dont care about what people say about me outside . i dont care about what people say about me now . i dont care about what people are gonna comment about this post of mine . i dont care . i dont simply care . say what you wanna say about me in school . im so like HECK .
Secondly .YES I DISLIKE YOU THAT MUCH ... we actually planned to tell you this after teh O's but since you know everything , i have decided to say this clear right now . I DISLIKE YOU .. YOU SUCK .. you may say that i am betraying your friendship . i dont care ... no worries , i wont appear in front of you anymore . i wont care how much you backstab me or insult me now . just do it . i shall pretend that i have never known someone like you . I would not remember those days we had together .
A word of advice ... you better change that freaking of yours before you lose all your friends. and please. i would appretiate if you remove me off your family tree :)
BYE . OUR FRIENDSHIP COMES TO AN END , AS OF NOW .
Thats taken from HuiJin's blog. Basically. i won't deny that im sad that things turn out like this. Yes, im evil. im an ass. i don't think. Neither did i realise how overbearing i was to them. i didn't think about what i did nor what they thought. i just did things according to my own thinking. Yes, i have changed. im never who i was 1,2 or 3 years ago. Seems like im the one betraying this friendship instead of you. Same goes for Sakdiyah.
Imprints of ♥ 6:23 PM.
I thought you were my friends. But it turns out to be fake. I thought that you both were different. Wait, you ALL were different, but it seems like its all just faked acts of kindness and friendship. You forgo 4 years of friendship by doing what you did. Im disappointed. I really am. You betrayed whatever trust i had in you and i don't think you will ever be able to win it back again. You backstab, you scold, you insult and you do all sorts of things i thought wouldn't come from you. I really feel disappointed in you. Hate me for who i am. I won't stop you. But im telling you this. Do it right in my face. Don't be a hypocrite by saying one thing and doing the opposite. Thats not the people i know. Like i said, i won't slander or insult you. Im just stating facts. If you really dislike me that much, i will leave you alone. You won't need to be anywhere near me and vice versa. You scold me outright in my face and i won't bother you. Its the way you live your life and the way i live mine.
Garry, irene, johnathan. I don't wanna pursue this passerby matter anymore. They can scold and insult me for all they want. I won't retaliate neither will i c0nfront them neither will i do anything to them. Because i mean nothing to them and they mean nothing to me. If being friends with them means getting insulted by them then by all means do so. I forgo this kind of friendships because it just isn't worth it. But anyhow, thanks for sticking up for me.
Imprints of ♥ 9:44 AM.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Today is Dewi and Muhammud's birthday.
Respetively:
Dewi Meii: HAPPY 15TH MEII. STAY PRETTY AND LAST LONG WITH RANDY HORHHS! II MISS YOU LOADS!Muhammud: HAPPY 16TH TO YOU! The present the guys gave to you should be handy sia. xDDMy NuEr and ErZi getting a bit pissed off liao. o.O Funny.
Basically, to that passerby person, you know what? Heres something ii wanna tell you, you SERIOUSLY are retarded. So what if iim fat? ii don't see myself doing drastic things just because of that. Also, iim not even complaining. So who are you to judge me for who ii am? You talked about Joachim right? Let me tell you something. You don't know NOTHING about what happened between me and him. So just keep your fucking mouth shut and stop talking nonsense if you don't know SHIT about the exact details. Go on, spread all you want. ii don't bloody give a damn. ii know what he did, he knows what he did, my nuer and sun nu knows what he did, Jane, Sijia, Sakdiyah and HuiJin knows what he did. But you don't, so just FUCK OFF.
Imprints of ♥ 10:05 PM.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Alright, ii think ii know who is that M&M person on boy's blog. Boy refering to Marcus. ii shan't name anyone here. o.O Its too risky.
Anywayys, life hasn't been that much of a joy to me recently. Everything now seems to revolve around books, books and more books. That basically refering to storybooks and assessment books. Maybe iim going mad, maybe iim just turning into a study freak. ii don't know. But ii do know the cause of it. And ii won't tell you anything.
ii do miss him. ii really do. But ii can't tell him that. Its not supposed to be known. ii love you. And ii miss you.
Imprints of ♥ 7:50 PM.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
To that one passer-by, ii shall tell you this. You unfaze me. For ii am Sharlene Tang. ii wouldn't bat an eyelid if you were to drop dead infront of me shouting murderer, with your finger pointing at me. If you insult my friends ONE more time, then you are REALLY pushing your luck. And when THAT happens, then ii think you would find yourself in for a NICE cat and mouse chase. C'mon. Try me. ii wouldn't care. But ii REALLY hope you would come insult my friends more, because THEN ii would get a REAL great show to watch. Maybe ii would record it down. That would be nice. Being in the sidelines, watching you get caught. HAH! That would be SWEET SWEET heaven for ME.
Buzz off loser.
Imprints of ♥ 6:36 PM.
Basically, ii have decided that some kind of people in this world just ain't worth my time at all. Anything that that idiot has told me seems like a dream. ii promise to myself now that he will have n0thing to do with me and hopefully he would just give up and get lost. iim currently updating with jane's ph0ne again. Hahahs. Both of us are bored and iim supposed to be doing my english homework. O.o There is no f&n asp today. Hahahs! ii will get him out of my head. Thanks to Irene, Nadiah, Jane and Marcus, ii happened to be a normal person until ii reached home. And SOMEBODY asked me what was shortening yesterday. Obviously its vegetable shortening what right. O.o Weird. Mooncakes, ii kinda miss my grandma. Hmmms... Sunday got steamboat. Most of my relatives should be coming over? O.o Back to class now. Bye people!
Imprints of ♥ 11:57 AM.
Saturday, September 06, 2008
Some would ask if ii was too hasty in this decision that ii made. ii would just tell them that ii don't know. Because really, ii don't. ii can't figure out what is real or what is fake. ii don't konw who or what to believe. His words, some fake some real. Which should ii believe and which should ii throw away. Are there lies or are there things that are not meant for me in the first place. Really. ii don't know and ii don't think ii ever want to know.
Basically, ii shall just say this once, maybe only once for him.
Joachim, ii don't think you will see this. But ii shall just place the last bet here. ii don't care if you think iim childish or anything. iim too childish for you, thats what you told me. Maybe ii am. Maybe its just me. ii can't help it. Its in me. Seriously, ii don't know who or what to believe. ii can only believe in myself. ii don't want to hurt myself in any way humanly possible. So if ii did hurt you in the process or protecting myself, then ii can only apologise. Sorry and thanks for the memories. You ARE a nice guy. But it just seems like ii trust myself more than you.
Imprints of ♥ 10:36 PM.
Guys should NEVER EVER GET ON MY NERVES.
They should just fucking keep to themselves.
ii wish you were dead.
ii wish ii never met you.
ii wish you were just an illusion.
ii just want you out of my life.
Get lost, go away.
Do whatever you want.
ii don't fucking care.
Imprints of ♥ 12:39 PM.
Friday, September 05, 2008
Your the voice ii hear inside my headThe reason that iim singing.ii need to find you, ii gotta find you.Your the missing piece ii needThe song inside of me.ii need to find you, ii gotta find you.Is everything really a dream or an illusion.
ii really don't know which is fact aand which is fiction.
Will someone tell me which is real and which is fake?
When ii want something to real, it is fake.
When ii want something to fake, it is real.
What the hell is going on now?
Are your feelings real or fake?
Are you just playing or are you serious.
ii wonder.
Are you really true?
Imprints of ♥ 10:41 PM.
ii took this off WOMAN'S xanga. Hahahs.
1.Do you eat a lot of fast food?
YES. Hahahs. ii ate Macs just yesterday. xDD
2.Have you kissed anyone in 2008?ii don't know? Nadiah, Irene, mama? LOL.
3.Were you happy when you woke up today?No, cause ii just wasn't.
4.What did you last get upset about?
Something HE did.
5.Do you eat candy on a daily basis?
Maybe? ii have a sweet tooth.
6.What about in your 5th sent message?
Asking Jane why she wants to go to Compass to early?
7.Who was the last person you ate with?Myself in the library?
8.Who was the last person you took a picture of?
PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL! xDD
ii took photos of WeiJie during tuition.9.When ordering sushi, what do you get?ii think ii would find my unagi. Hahahs. And ebiko.
10.Who was the last person you sat next to?Marcus? Or was it the lady in the bus. o.O
11.What were you doing at 10 am?Sleeping. Got woken up at 1015 though.
12.Have you changed a lot since summer?
ii have no idea.
13.What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?Water?
14.Where is the place you want to be right now?
In bed.
15.When was the last time you criedii think it was 2 nights ago because of soemthing stupid.
16.What's your favorite song at the moment?This is me by Demi Lovato feat. Joe Jonas.
17.What were you doing at 11 last night?ii think ii was still sms-ing WOMAN.
18.Who's near you?No one?
19.What were you doing at 5am in the morning?Thinking about something which happens to bother me in my SLEEP.
20.What's bothering you right now?
Problems and more problems.
21.Who was the last person to talk to you on the phone?
Jane, to check if she added the blogsong for me. Which she did. ARIGATO!
22.Whose house did you go to last?Mine? o.O Wait, make it ahhmahh's void deck.
23.Who honestly knows everything about you?ii think its gotta be me. Its me against the world you know?
24.Who broken your heart?
Strike that out. ii don't like this question.
25.Honestly, do you love someone very much? Who?
Yes ii do. My
ownself. 26.Who was the last person to tell you that they love you?
ii shall never believe in anything he says again.
27.Are you friends with the last person you kissed?
ii think the last person ii kissed was my mum. o.O
28.Are there any parts of your body that hurt?My heart and my head.
29.In the supermarket, the first thing that gets your attention is?Sunkist Orange Juice. xDD
30.How cool do you think you are?
ii don't think iim in the right position to answer that.
31.Drugs are?
NICE! xD
32.Which one do you hate the most?
Hate what?
33.Who was the first person to text you today?
Jane, she wanted me to accompany her to Compass Point.
34.What was the first thing you did this morning?
Check if anyone sms-ed me anything. Hahahs.
35.Who was your last missed call on your cell phone?ii think it was Nadiah. Maybe? Forgot who.
36.What's the last mistake you made?Careless mistake? o.O
37.What are you listening to right now?This is me by Demi Lovato feat. Joe Jonas of the Camp Rock soundtrack.
38.Who was the last person of the opposite sex you had a conversation with?Eugene Chieng. Or maybe Marcus. Hahahs.
39.Who was the last person to call you?Last person to call me? Should be Eugene. Lols.
40.Is there anything that you want to say to someone special?Yes, you are a fucking moronic person and ii never wanna see you again. GET LOST BASTARD.
Imprints of ♥ 6:21 PM.
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
60 things most girls don't know-Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (Oh yeah. You're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 6 guys. You're a WHORE)-"Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.-Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.-Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.-Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.-Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him.-Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're going for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method.-A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.-Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved.-Don't talk about your guy friends to your boyfriend.-Guys get jealous easily.-Guys are more emotional than they'd like people to think.-Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?!..uh...nevermind.." would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out.-Guys are good flatterers when courting but they usually stammer when they talk to a girl they really like.-Guys hate asking parents for money to buy girls presents. So they come up with ideas like saving their lunch money for a week. But it never works because guys are always hungry so they end up asking the parents for money anyway.-Girls are guys' weaknesses.-Guys are very open about themselves.-It's good to test a guy first before you trust him. But don't let him wait too long.-Your best friend, whom your boyfriend seeks help from about his problems with you may end up being admired by your boyfriend.-If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.-A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.-Guys love you more than you love them if they are serious in your relationships.-Guys will brag about anything.-Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. We rarely use beautiful. If a guy uses that, he likes you a whole hell of a lot.-No matter how much guys talk about asses and boobs, personality is key.-Guys learn from experience not from the romance books that girls read and take as their basis of experience.-Guys worry about the thin line between being compassionate and being whipped.-Guys think WAY too much. One small thing a girl does, even if she doesn't notice it can make the guy think about it for hours, trying to figure out what it meant.-Guys seek for advice from girls not other guys. Because most guys think alike, so if one guy's confused, then we're all confused.-Any guy could write out a rulebook or advice book for flirting, but no guy can write out a book about relationships.-Try to be as straightforward as possible.-If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.-If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he's probably faking it and is spazzing inside.-When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is. Guys rarely say that.-When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me."-Guys don't really have final decisions.-If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn't happen that often, so when it does, you know something's up.-If your best guy friend seems to avoid you or is never around when you're with your boyfriend, he's probably jealous and likes you.-When a guy tells you that you are beautiful, don't say you aren't. It makes them want to stop telling you because they don't want you to disagree with them.-When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he's definitely thinking something.-Guys like femininity not feebleness.-Guys don't like girls who punch harder than they do.-A guy has more problems than you can see with your naked eyes.-Don't be a snob. Guys can be intimidated and give up easily.-Everything in moderation. Put on makeup, wear perfume. Just not too much.-Guys talk about girls more than girls talk about guys.-Guys hate rejection, but they hate being led on even more.-If you are going to reject a guy, just do it. Don't say they are like a brother or just good friends, it just hurts even more. Tell them that you aren't interested in a relationship and they will respect you.-Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions and are MAD confusing but somehow are drawn even more to them.-A guy would give his left nut to be able to read a girl's mind for a day.-No guy can handle all his problems on his own. He's just too stubborn to admit it.-Not all guys are assholes. Just because ONE is a jackass doesnt mean he represents ALL of us.-We don't like girls who are too skinny.-We love it when girls talk about there boobs.-Always make sure you know what kind of stuff your getting into before making out with a guy. Like whether it's a one time deal or not.-Believe it or not shy guys are the most easiest to talk to. It may not seem right but trust me they will start opening up like books after you just ask them questions about their lives and unoticable tell them about yours.-When a guy hits your butt it means that he wants you sexually-Even if they refuse it all guys are ticklish on the ribs.-Guys love neck rubs and if he lets you keep doing it. It means that he really likes you or his neck really hurts...-Guys will test the waters to see how far they can get with you. Even if he doesn't intend to it will happen. Know how far it is you want to let him go and he will respect that. After you let him know a couple times.-When a guy sacrifices his sleep and health just to be with you, he really likes you and wants to be with you as much as possible.Something uber random that ii found off the web when surfing. Hahahs. This is interesting sia. ii shall see how many of these are true between me and dear. xDD Cause ii don't know which one of these things listed applies to dear. HAHAH! So ii shall check it out yahh?
Imprints of ♥ 2:25 AM.
Monday, September 01, 2008
Alright. Its my mama's birthday tomorrow. =.=''' And iim not in the mood to celebrate sia. ii tahan-ed 7 hours of POA just now. God. ii think ii will die. You know what? ii still have another session tomorrow AND another 2 more for maths on Thursday and Friday. Ohh god. ii think iim going to faint.
Irene went to China this morning. Bleahhs. The rest are stuck at home. Woman told me something funny. Dear left his PHONES at home, again. And just sms-ed me not long ago. Muhahahahah. The N'levels are starting tomorrow. ii wish them luck. Hopefully ii will be able to survive tomorrow and come back in one piece with my brain intact. And hopefully ii will be able to get good results for my prelims if not ii can say BYEBYE to my precious phone. BLAH LARHHS MY MAMA! She say if my results not good she is going to take my phone (which is ridiculous) and ii have to pay the FULL amount for the damn trip this December holidays (this is even MORE ridiculous than the previous thing). See? She is mad. GAHH! iim going to die soon. Maybe it wasn't a wise choice to drink 2 or maybe 3 dosages of coffee. One large JavaChip Frappachino and a can of Mocha. Gahh! ii cannot sleep liao larhhs. Like what woman said, iim the queen of the dark. Lols. Nocturnal animal sia me. xDD
WOMAN! You should just think about what ii told you about AHEMAHEM* lorhhs. ii think the both of you look CUTE together alright? HEHEHEHEHEHEH! And hopefully me and dear will last long enough for whatever dreams we had the other day to come true yahhs? xDD CHEERS AND GOOD LUCK FOR YOUR N'S WOMAN! You can do it, ii hope? MISSES!
P.S. TAKE CARE OF MY BOOK HORHHHHHS YOU WOMAN!
Imprints of ♥ 11:44 PM.